Our discussion of the Self must include the way we see ourselves in relation to life. How you answer the question in this posting's title gives profound insight into how you view yourself in relations to others and your ability to instigate change in your life.
There are two schools of thought about the Self: the first sees the Self as being passive and reactive to events around us. Adherents to this point of view feel powerless in their lives and unable to affect the course of their lives. As a result, people tend to tell "rut stories" about their life. Rut stories are those that repeat the same tired themes and the same complaints.
The second sees the Self as being an active, creative choice-maker. From this point of view, any situation we are in presents us with a range of behavioral, cognitive, and emotional options. We choose our course of action, our thoughts, and our emotional response to the situation. This results in people telling "river stories" about their lives. River stories flow, are constantly changing, and are creative in nature. One wise saying is "you can't step in the same river twice."
Granted, at times our range of possible choices may seem quite limited. Or maybe we don't see other choices at the moment. However, looking for options, considering possible lines of action, and challenging yourself to think creatively reaps quite amazing results! At the very least, we can all change our thoughts in any given situation.
To which school of thought do you adhere? What stories do you tell about your life?
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I have always viewed myself as an active and creative person. I like to change routines and try new things. In classes and lectures, I am usually that guy who can't sit still and has to talk to people sitting around me. I changed my major about four or five times, ranging from Pharmacy to Accounting to Advertising, getting a little taste of everything that the Universities of Louisville and Kentucky has to offer. Normally, I do not let events in my life change the way I think or act, but instead just live how I feel I should regardless.
ReplyDeleteRecently that has changed for me. With the recent passing of my mother, it is difficult to avoid changes in my life. In such a short time I have realized I am now taking care of my brother, father and dog, as well as the rest of my house and everything in it. Events like this make you analyze your life and figure out what to do.
That is why I liked the question posed in the title fo this thread. I do not know exactly which school of thought I am placed in anymore, but I have definitely been considering thousands of options and possibilities as to how I am going to lead the rest of my life. I cannot place myself in one specific self impact. However, I have decided that no matter how much you try to follow one over the other, there will always be events and situations in life that share the two schools and change your sense of self.
I would definitely place myself in the second school of thought. I try to be mindful that I'm only going to live once, and to make the best of every situation.I think it's important to experience as many things as possible and take advantage of every opportunity that arises, from trying different foods to travelling to different cities to seeing as many concerts as I possibly can, you name it. I constantly have a list of books I want to read or movies I want to see or places I want to go. Meeting new people is also a favorite of mine. There is so much to learn just by listening to what other people have to say. :D
ReplyDeleteMegan Powers, Comm 315-50
Right now I am at a place in my life where I can relate to both schools of thought. I am 45 and going back to school to finish my degree while working full-time. I've done quite a few things in the last couple of years. I am proud of myself for stepping out of my rut and having a few "river stories". Mostly though, I am the quintessential "rut women of the year". Same job, same husband, same friends. By the same token, I know that I do that by choice and fate has not forced me with these circumstances.
ReplyDeleteOkay, I don't mean to scare anyone who is much younger than me. Most people who are 45 have life figured out by now :) terri
woods-Comm315
At this point in my life, I would say that I can relate to the second school of thought the most. I find my self to be very pro-active, and like to take charge of any curve balls that might be thrown my way. For instance, I just transfered to UofL this year to finish my bachelor's degree after not being in college for quite a few yrs. I do also feel that there have been certain times in my life where I have been in a rut. One being the reason I quit college yrs ago. I ended up pregnant at the end of my sophmore yr at EKU which was not planned at all. My husband who was a few yrs older and had already graduated wanted me to quit school and be a stay at home mom and take care of our children. After being in this rut for awhile I decided that I wanted to take charge of my self and actions and finish what I started. I realize that life is to short and if you have goals or dreams for yourself, you need to take charge of the curveballs thrown your way and step up to the plate. Do what makes you happy and fulfilled. I am very happy now that I am back in school here and look forward to accomplishing these goals of mine; to obtain my BS and a MAT from UofL. I feel alot more confident about myself now. I also want to set good examples for my daughters which have contributed greatly to me seeing myself as the 2nd school of thought being active, staying positive, and taking charge of my actions and responsibilities makes me feel like a better role model.
ReplyDeleteI do not feel that you must adhere to on school of thought in this particular notion. Cant we both affect our own life, and have life affect us? I view myself as a positive, ambitious, hard working person. Whenever I see something in life that I want, I do my best to seize the situation, and do whatever I can to achieve that goal. This allows me to discover the river, sail the river, and live to tell about it.
ReplyDeleteThat does not mean that there haven't been instances in life, where events out of my control have affected me. A prime example is would be the losing a close person in your life. No matter how strong, and self sufficient you are, if you lose someone you truly care about you will be affected. This can cause you to fall into a rut, in which you may never escape. I would say the school of thought you entertain would be based upon how you pull yourself out of the occasional rut.
Posted By Branden Hatfield Comm 315-50
I see myslef as being active and someone that is a "go-getter". In thinking back I usually never make the same mistake twice, they say the definition of insanity is to do something over and over expecting different results and thats not how I want to live my life! I take control in certain situations if applicable but I do let others do what they want to do also. I live by the quote, "You do YOU, and I will Do ME."
ReplyDeleteI believe anyone can impact their life. I also feel that life has an impact on you. You are your own person and no one can change you except for you. I have made the wrong choices some in my life but who dosen't. It is up to you to realize the mistakes that you can make that do impact your life. For example relationships, school, and your choice of friends. I feel that I acknowledged some of my mistakes earlier enough to make up for them. Life is short and I try to have a good, postive attitude everyday. I had to accept the fact of life... and know one can put you on the right track if you don't want to be. It's all about how you want to impact your life.
ReplyDeleteLife can always throw a curve ball at you that would impact someone's life. I recently had a young cousin that was murdered and was and still is a major impact on my life and my families. You try to move on and remember the good times. Thats all you can do. I believe that when life has an impact you positively or negetively it's your responsibility on how to handle it. You learn from life's experiences and it could help mold you into being a better person...if you want to.
Nancy Kindrick
Kathy Mattingly--COMM 315
ReplyDeleteI think most people subscribe to both schools at different points in life. I would say that I subscribe more to the second one than the first, but like Branden said, events out of our control have affected all of us. I have always been a take charge kind of person and have always made my own decisions about my life. However, along the way there have been events that have put me in a temporary rut. I think that's just life. The first one I think of is finding out six months after leaving WKU and thinking that I graduated that I really needed two more classes that I was not told about! Finding out about this made me mad and I was very frustrated. I had a good job and felt betrayed so I didn't do anything about it for a long time. Now, with the economy being in the state it is, the auto industry is in turmoil and jobs are always in question. I made the choice to go back and finish the two classes I needed to get my degree, just in case something happens and I need to find a new place to work. Also, I've been thinking about getting a Master's degree and I have to get the Bachelor's first!
Another time I was in a rut was after breaking up with my ex-fiancee. When you put so much of yourself into a relationship that you think is going to be forever and then things fall apart, you can't help but end up in a rut. I stayed in that rut for two years but I learned a lot about myself. I never thought about it as a rut because I looked at it as a time to do things for me and branch out with new experiences. Now I have found a wonderful man who encourages me to do whatever I want and whatever makes me happy!
Throughout life we will have to deal with many things that are out of our control, it's all a matter of how we deal with it and find a way to pull of those ruts along the way.
Active participant is the role that I play. I believe that when events in life do happen, even the ones that are out of your control, we still have control over how we feel or how we react to certain situations...in essence, how we allow that certain experience or experiences to either break us or makes us stronger. We are the masters of our own fate. Granted, there are environments that we are born into or elements of our lives that we wish were not there, but then again I still believe that is opportunity in disguise to make something of ourselves and to turn those negatives into positives. Stories told in one person's life can be "rut" stories or "river" stories. As long as the "rut" is not where you stay and eventually things begin flow.
ReplyDeleteMonique Stepney Comm 460
I choose to be present and active in my life. I prefer to see the "glass half full". In my life, like many others, I have been faced with unfortunate circumstances that could have easily defined me in a negative way. For instance, witnessing first-hand the abrupt death of my father in his 40's with no warning signs. I could have easily shut-down and became the victim to emotional turmoil but I chose to instead deal with my experience in working with children in grief and helping them to also see there is a reason for what happens and it’s the next step taken in life that may matter most. There are many people who I've known for sometime who still have yet to learn about that experience of mine. Instead I choose to share stories of personal growth, things I know for certain and what I'm still hopeful of accomplishing in my future. I am a strong believer that there are consequences for everything and how I personally deal with the aftermath (good or bad) is what I'd prefer to be remembered for. I try to set examples for my children that I may have initially struggled but what I gained along my path of uncertain times is what has defined me as the person I am today.
ReplyDeleteMaria R Davidso--COMM 315